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most of these will eventually end up on my Facebook Status
In celebration of Fat Tuesday, I just ate a Paczki. This pretty much guarantees me a Fat Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, too.
I don't always fall on the ice... but when I do, I get degree of difficulty points for 'sticking the landing' and keeping blood loss to a minimum.
You think I'm lazy, I act like I know everything and I talk too much? Well, I'm just sitting here, not knowing how to respond to that. Ironic, huh?
Lmao! I died
Thanks for trying to throw me under it, Miss Bee-yotch! Just remember... my Karma Bus is bigger than your Petty Jealous Bus!
I would be much more impressed with all the celebrity endorsed weight loss ads if the celebrities weren't air brushed, botoxed and Spanxed within an inch of their lives.
It really does!!
Sad but true.
You know who you are!
Sometimes you gotta say it ...
quit your poor, pitiful me stuff.
If you can't deal with my awesomeness, then take your jealous, petty self and move on down the road. You're starting to piss me off.
Or any day after that!
Surely not for you!