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Pickle fingers. Usually a Halloween costume, but also suitable for everyday wear.

"Someone *really* likes cinnamon buns." From www.regretsy.com

"These beautiful pants are handmade from recycled vintage afghans!" from www.regretsy.com

A coloring page for the kiddies. Who doesn't like lollipops and clowns?

This is better than the clown one, but I think it's just a good idea to not use your nipple as part of a tattoo design.

Wonder Sauna Hot Pants. Get sweaty and itchy in all the best places!

A knitting project for bad hair days.

My Beautiful Mommy, by plastic surgeon Michael Alexander Salzhauer, M.D. The picture book explains all about mom's new boobs, resculptured nose and liposuctioned butt. What's the lesson here? I can just hear the child saying, "I can't wait until I can pay to have someone make me pretty!" (Text from www.walletpop.com... )

Ribbed knit dress with hairdryer hat by Byron Lars, American designer

Mmm...got a hankering for one of those hot beef sundaes. Oh, yeah...

Mullet + Bowl = a mutation rarely seen or documented. This photo is being used as government evidence. Anyone caught with this hair style will have their head shaved immediately and never be allowed to own scissors again. (Photo from Awkward Family Photos)

Quote from a reviewer at Amazon.com: "This mask imbues the wearer with super-human abilities. The power to make everyone around you feel akward and uncomfortable being first among them. After wearing the mask for several days my identity was consumed and replaced. There is only the horse now. Best purchase I ever made."

Wow. I'm not sure it gets much worse than a clown tattoo with your nipple as the nose. Now, that's the stuff of nightmares.