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this also exists.... Sour Liquid Candy Urine Samples

Sorry I'm Awesome. $24.00, via Etsy.

Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars. Of course, then your eyeballs will boil and your lungs explode from decompression. But that's what you get for being a damn showoff.

yep, I admit it, I do it often.

When you wish upon a falling star, your dreams can come true. Unless it's really a meteorite hurtling to the Earth which will destroy all life. Then you're pretty much hosed no matter what you wish for. Unless it's death by meteor.

If a pretty poster and a cute saying are all it takes to motivate you, you probably have a very easy job. The kind robots will be doing soon.

Politicians are like diapers. They need to be changed often and for the same reason.

Minds are like parachutes. Just because you've lost yours doesn't mean you can borrow mine.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

All we ask here is that you give us your heart.

Money can't buy you love. But it can buy exotic cars and luxury yachts. Once you've got those covered, you'll be fighting love off with a stick.