I deliberately alter my standard of customer service according to how polite the customer is.. So true!
Science of Parenthood's handy-dandy guide to the Who, What & Why You Should Give a F*ck about your kid's obsession with #Minecraft.
OMG I too once had a murderous Molly fish. Killed any other fish put in the tank with him. Then when he got moved to his own smaller time out tank, tried to commit suicide not once, not twice, but three times, by jumping out and drying up. Each time, he was found farther and farther from his bowl, and each time, he survived. Badass killer fish.
The Funniest For Sale Ad Ever!
Dogs wearing panty hose.... hhaha oh my gosh I am in tears from laughing so hard. I know what I'm doing when I get home and anthony is at the gym hahaa
"We have White People Problems, in America. That's what we have. White People Problems. You know what that is? That's where your life is *amazing*, so you just make shit up to be upset about. People in other countries have *real* problems. Like - 'Oh, shit. They're cutting off all our heads today!' Things like that. Here, we make shit up to be upset about. Like - 'How come I have to choose a language on the ATM machine? It's *bullshit*. I shouldn't have to do that. I'm *American*.'" (Louis CK)