Hilarious! "This is your Birthday and to show I care, I wanted to get you something to wear…I wasn’t sure of your size, and money is tight, and buying the wrong thing just wouldn’t be right… So, I’m giving you something I know you can use; It’s almost as useful as a new pair of shoes. Now every time you sit to pee, I know that you will be thinking of me! So, use this gift to dry your tush, Then make a wish before you flush."
Put duct tape on ziplock bags, now you can punch holes in them and store them in a binder and they won't rip.