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    Elf on a Shelf is Evil


    Elf on a Shelf is Evil

    • 48 Pins

    By all means, clock him in the fight for goodness!

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    Much less creepy.

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    I've always loved Bumble.

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    So am I the only one who wonders who he scalped to get that head of hair?

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    Nooooooo!!! What have you done to Rudolph, you sadistic bastard?!!

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    Looks like the next door neighbor is taking a shower...

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    What the HELL kind of drug turns urine this color? Santa should start doing random drug tests. I wouldn't want to be around when Elf starts tripping on whatever that was.

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    So your kid gets up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, and what’s waiting there for him? An elf with a freaking RAZOR! This thing makes the Boogey Man look like Mary Poppins!

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    OK, obviously Elf has an underwear fetish. But by all means, you bring one into your house! I'm sure the kids' therapy won't cost all that much.

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    Good luck buying Christmas presents for your kids now!

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    You didn't know the Elves had their own mafia, did you? Well, here you go. The work of a professional hit elf. Nothing is sacred. Not even other elves.

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    This elf was in prison for triple murder. Now he's on the lam. Just know that any elf you bring into your house COULD BE THIS ONE!!

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    Oh my god! He's beheaded Santa and scooped out his brains!!

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    Exactly.

    Christmas Ecard: 'Elf'.

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    Pole dancing is not appropriate for young children. Elf does not care.

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    When Elf doesn't get his way, he curls up in the fetal position. Just like David in American Werewolf in London. Right before he turned into a frothing at the mouth monster.

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    Putting a Puzzle together. With a Great White on it. You know elves are magic, right? And can make that come to life at night right before you get in the tub?

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    He called social services and reported you for child abuse and neglect. Oh, look! He has your summons!

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    Elf caught these guys, put them in a giant cauldron and stewed them alive. Just like the cannibals in New Guinea.

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    I think I can...(ungh) pry this...(oof) off the wall... (ungh) and send it crashing... (hff) to the floor!

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    Clearly, it's a very bad idea to leave your wallet with your credit cards on the dresser while you sleep.

    Awesome Elf on the Shelf Ideas

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    You know what we do with stool pigeons, Joey?

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    "Anyone seen the hamster?"

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    You people have seen "Psycho", right?

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    Now that he's jacked up on god knows what-all, it's time for a little joy ride!

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