More like three times! I lock up my car, I always press the button twice in a row to let all nearby thieves know I mean business.

Pack your bags, we’re going on a guilt trip. (Magnet on sale at Etsy.


Petting chart for your cat and dog…

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I'm glad everyone is having such a delightful day walking slow as fuck in front of me. STORY OF MY LIFE!

Other than work, I don't leave my house, and that's getting more difficult! I hate people!

It's seriously the ONLY thing I hate about the South in the Summer!

Yep, the way i feel these days and extroverted/ introvert, confusing but real! ♡♡♡I am an introvert.

Do you ever have the urge to tell someone to shut the fuck up even when they aren't talking? ALL THE TIME!

As I approach my household from a heavy night of drinking:

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Funny Ecards-tupperwhere the fuck is the fucking lid? So true!

Free and Funny News Ecard: I'm sorry, call me old fashioned, but I think shorts should be longer than your vagina.