As for the expect nothing part, I believe we shouldn't give in hopes of receiving. However, it is crucial to place your hope and expectation in the Lord. And if someone loves you, expect their actions to match their words.
if you can't be kind, be quiet. If only people remember that in the "HEAT" of the moment. When we were young, we were told just about the same thing. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all"