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    Funny Quotes


    Funny Quotes

    • 800 Pins

    Looks like the hot nights are over. But enough about my SEX LIFE.

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    Panic

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    Mood Swings

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    Everything I like is either expensive, fattening or won't text me back.

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    Write that bitch a sonnet. Bitches love sonnets.

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    Just fat

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    I'd jump up and down for joy, but my boobs are just way too big for that nonsense.

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    I paid my psychiatrist to follow me on facebook..

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    This happens every time!

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    I love you with all my butt, I would say heart, but my butt is bigger.

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    Farts are just the ghosts of the things we ate.

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    There seems to be no sign of intelligent life anywhere.

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    Can I be excused for the rest of my life?

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    Karma's about to give you a great big kiss!

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    Being a person is getting too complicated. Time to be a unicorn.

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    I don't understand why you pay a shrink. I'll tell you what's wrong with you for free.

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    Me? Crazy?

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    Go sell crazy somewhere else, we're all stocked up here.

    GO SELL CRAZY SOMEWHERE ELSE WE'RE ALL STOCKED UP HERE

    quickmeme.com

    How's that working out?

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    • Elma Esteria
      Elma Esteria

      Fine

    I thought 2015 was going to be my year but clearly that ship has sailed.

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    Ha Ha Ha!

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    • Koraly Ash
      Koraly Ash

      That's hilarious!!!!!!😎😄😃😎😀😂

    Sometimes all you need is someone to hold you and say "It's going to be okay. You're beautiful. Here, have $10 million."

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    We will probably never understand black holes. Or why women fall madly in love with douchbags.

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    I'm gonna go fuck shit up...You comin???

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    It's been one of those days for like 3 years now.

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