Don't mistake this fake smile and professional body language.   I'd punch you in the throat if I knew I wouldn't lose my job.

Don't mistake this fake smile and professional body language. I'd punch you in the throat if I knew I wouldn't lose my job. OR IN SPITE OF LOSING MY JOB!

I am really bad at measuring pasta, so if you and 79 of your friends want spaghetti, come on over!

I am really bad at measuring pasta, so if you and 79 of your friends want spaghetti, come on over! Hahahah soooo me!

SALTS

Joke All You Can: Instead of saying LOL, I'm gonna say SALTS ( smiled a little, then stopped). It's more truthful

Oops

Free, Confession Ecard: I woke up to drink some water in the middle of the night and I accidentally ate a whole pizza and a cheesecake. So nan

You're such a good friend that if we were ever in a sinking boat and there was only one life preserver, I'd miss you and think about you often.

Funny Friendship Ecard: You're such a good friend that if we were ever in a sinking boat and there was only one life preserver, I'd miss you and think about you often. you can swim better after all.

hahaha so true...

The new generation of kids

Behold, I have added my own caption to condescending wonka. jbemmz Behold, I have added my own caption to condescending wonka. Behold, I have added my own caption to condescending wonka.

lololololololololololololololololololol!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel stupid at how hard I laughed.

Here is an ad for a hair product that shows that it can tame wild hair and prevent frizz. The fact that it illustrates this by using a lion is very humorous.

hahahhaa

when a pregnancy test confirms your worst fear. You are just fat.

Listen.... Acting like a dick won't make yours any bigger...

LOL Someone needs teach this to boys, so they can grow to be better men

hahaha

Store bought is fine. :) Oh my word! Ina Garten drives me crazy! "Oh, you can't afford organic spices that you can only find in remote ends of the earth, and that cost a gazillion dollars? Then, store bought is fine. I'm rich!

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