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I'm doing my part to conserve water by drinking wine instead.

I'd go out during a high pollen count to see you.

Congratulations on losing enough weight to update your profile picture.

Whenever anything major happens to me, you'll be the first to know after Facebook.

I'm honored to be the anonymous arm of a cropped out body in your new profile picture.

Happy Earth Day to someone even hotter than our planet.

The common thread in all your problems is you.

Sorry we keep getting into fights about things you're always wrong about.

I find your lack of Disney magic disturbing.

So then they handcuffed me and said "Anything you say can and will be held against you." So I said "Ryan Gosling."

funny your e cards Ryan Gosling

pickup lines


Happy Hour Humor 67 | Hampton Roads Happy Hour

Oh, I'm sorry - Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?


People that pronounce vase like "voz" make me want to punch them in the foz.

puppets and crayons

Lane's Lacquers: *NEW* The Monday Meme...

Except for that

Baking humor๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿก๐Ÿช

Happy Hour Humor 26 | Hampton Roads Happy Hour

Good thing you put a photo of your kids on your holiday card in case anyone hadn't seen the 15,239 you posted on Facebook this year.


Don't care


The definition of wine.


If I have to use my critical thinking skills all day, everyday, the least you could do is use your common sense!

Is your drama going to have an intermission soon? I need to pee. | #someecards #drama