"If someone breaks your heart, punch them in the face. Punch them in the face and go get some ice cream." ~Frank Ocean No broken heart here, but I like the part about punching someone in the face and getting ice cream.


"I need a new perspective on life . or maybe just a nap. Yeah, probably just a nap." A nap can cure any number of ills.

truth lol

Funny Confession Ecard: Raisin oatmeal cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason I have trust issues.

sad but true!

this hilarious! yet too true.i literally say that and feel like part of my soul dies every time i have to fill up on premium gas

jeans boots

boots made from old jeans jury's out on this one, but I like the idea of making shoes with repurposed stuff, plus they would look cute with a bandana tied through the belt loops!

More ideas
Drunk humor

Funny Friendship Ecard: You drink too much, swear too much and have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.

Today's mood: Bitchy with a chance of sarcasm. :D

I would rather be known in life as an honest sinner, than a lying hypocrite.

I hate when cashiers ask, 'Will that be it for you?' Um no, I'd like all this invisible shit, too.

Um no, I'd like all this invisible shit too. Um no, I'd like all this invisible shit too. Um no, I'd like all this invisible shit too.

I've gotta admit that while I'm not perfectly happy being this fat, I DID enjoy every bite of the way.

cyndi lauper claims that "girls just wanna have fun." pfft please, girls just wanna eat without getting fat.

I think I know you Liz. Chocolate candy young woman!! Remember me? How can I get in touch? Cheers!

Hello, Summer! 6 Must-Haves for the Beach

Funny Birthday Ecard: Welcome to Where every other weekend is a wedding, you feel borderline inappropriate shopping in Forever and two drinks equal a hangover. this is so me Smith

Funny Confession Ecard: You're right, shopping won't fix the problem. But it will put me in a better mood for when I actually have to deal with it.

Retail Therapy works for me! Real therapy would probably be less expensive though. oh well

Dress http://media-cache4.pinterest.com/upload/229261437250923064_esizVG1B_f.jpg iamfreeindeed lookin good

The Pinterest Reflection

Funny Thinking of You Ecard: 'Wow, that guy in the skinny jeans looks super manly,' said no one ever.

OMG I hate it when guys wear skinny jeans.actually I hate skinny jeans on ANYONE!


Singing a song you don't know? That 15 second part you DO know is coming up.and you're gonna OWN that shit. STORY OF MY LIFE!

Sassy Pants....check!

ecards lol reminds me of something Ken Barbie from Toy Story 3 would say.