The Adopted Chameleon

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8mo

Lorah Gerald

Adoption starts with trauma. A woman becomes pregnant and hasn’t planned to be a mother. Her situation becomes a crisis. She might go to a crisis pregnancy center or someone to talk about her options. As soon as an adoption agency comes in, she more than likely won’t be able to change her mind. The adoption agency will convince her that adoption is a selfless act. They will say her baby deserves more. The gaslighting will continue until they have her sign adoption papers. The adoption industry will do whatever it takes to get babies to sell.
The baby has waited months to be with their mother, not strangers. As soon as the baby is born the mother is discarded and the baby is commodified for the hopeful adoptive parents. The baby will be traumatized as well as the mother.
Replacing an adop Ordained Minister, Adoption Papers, Work Yoga, Tea Reading, Parasympathetic Nervous System, Adoptive Parents, Yoga Help, Yoga Therapy, Reiki Master

Parasympathetic Nervous System

Adoption perpetuates generational trauma

Adoption starts with trauma. A woman becomes pregnant and hasn’t planned to be a mother. Her situation becomes a crisis. She might go to a crisis pregnancy center or someone to talk about her options. As soon as an adoption agency comes in, she more than likely won’t be able to change her mind. The adoption agency will convince her that adoption is a selfless act. They will say her baby deserves more. The gaslighting will continue until they have her sign adoption papers. The adoption industry will do whatever it takes to get babies to sell. The baby has waited months to be with their mother, not strangers. As soon as the baby is born the mother is discarded and the baby is commodified for the hopeful adoptive parents. The baby will be traumatized as well as the mother. Replacing an adop

My adoptive mother had lots of trauma. She told me that all she ever wanted to be in her life was a mother. She had a forced hysterectomy by a man that she was married to prior to my adoptive father. That used to be allowed. It wasn’t that long ago. Not having rights over your own body has repercussions.
She was told that she could “just” adopt. She was never told that babies are traumatized when separated from their birth mother. She was told that I would be a blank slate. She would say proudly, “you’re MY daughter.”
I never asked questions about my family because I knew it would hurt her. I buried how I felt about being adopted to be the daughter that she had prayed for.
I didn’t do either of us any good by denying who I was. She didn’t do herself or me any favors by not getting help Broken Daughter, Adoption Loss, About My Family, Adoptive Mother, Infant Adoption

Adopting a baby won’t fix your trauma

My adoptive mother had lots of trauma. She told me that all she ever wanted to be in her life was a mother. She had a forced hysterectomy by a man that she was married to prior to my adoptive father. That used to be allowed. It wasn’t that long ago. Not having rights over your own body has repercussions. She was told that she could “just” adopt. She was never told that babies are traumatized when separated from their birth mother. She was told that I would be a blank slate. She would say proudly, “you’re MY daughter.” I never asked questions about my family because I knew it would hurt her. I buried how I felt about being adopted to be the daughter that she had prayed for. I didn’t do either of us any good by denying who I was. She didn’t do herself or me any favors by not getting help

We are part of our mother and grandmother. Our DNA carries the generations before us. We have genetic mirroring in our family. We can see who our ancestors are. We know them because we are them.
Unless you are adopted. You have to pretend your adoptive parents family are your ancestors. You pretend to be like them. You may even use them as your family tree in school. Closed adoptions are still legal and preferred by many hopeful adoptive parents.
Adoptees are fighting for their rights to their own heritage every day. Imagine you weren’t allowed to know where your eyes, your mannerisms, your innate abilities came from. Your identity was confusing because you weren’t allowed to know where your characteristics were from. This is adoption. It is not for the child. This is for the adults maki Yoga Instructor

Yoga Instructor

Adoption robs the adoptee of knowing their heritage

We are part of our mother and grandmother. Our DNA carries the generations before us. We have genetic mirroring in our family. We can see who our ancestors are. We know them because we are them. Unless you are adopted. You have to pretend your adoptive parents family are your ancestors. You pretend to be like them. You may even use them as your family tree in school. Closed adoptions are still legal and preferred by many hopeful adoptive parents. Adoptees are fighting for their rights to their own heritage every day. Imagine you weren’t allowed to know where your eyes, your mannerisms, your innate abilities came from. Your identity was confusing because you weren’t allowed to know where your characteristics were from. This is adoption. It is not for the child. This is for the adults maki

the text reads consumerism, and it is not clear that people are using them

Any Means Necessary

By Any Means Necessary

Adoption is consumerism

“Consumerism is a social and economic order in which the goals of many individuals include the acquisition of goods and services beyond those that are necessary for survival or for traditional displays of status. It is the drive to buy and own more stuff, and to define one's identity through what they own.” The consumer’s wants are the most important thing. This sounds like adoption. It is solely driven by a want to acquire a baby by any means necessary. It is not for survival or a need. It is a want and those with the money can achieve their want. Adoptees don’t have the same rights as kept people. There have been court cases this week where Senators and groups including the ACLU opposed allowing adoptees having access to their information. They claim it is due to privacy of the birth mo

No one is owed a baby

In the US, the adoption and fertility industry go to extremes to make sure that everyone has the baby experience. These industries are unregulated and make billions of dollars. They are not child centered. Their goal is profit. They know that people are desperate for a baby. This desperation causes unethical practices to go unchecked. People don’t need a child to have a great life. Look at Dolly Parton. She couldn’t have children and instead of acquiring one, by any means necessary, she started a nonprofit to help children. She didn’t need to own a child. Adoption is ownership. It is an egocentric want, not a need. The baby needs their mother. Supporting family preservation will be better for everyone. No one is owed a baby. #adoptedchameleon

Listen to adult adoptees

To stop generational trauma we should listen to adoptees. As adults who lived through being permanently separated from our families, we are the people who can tell you what it feels like. We know what losing our heritage costs us. We know how being removed from our mothers causes trauma. To become a better society we need to focus on the developmental health of our children. When we are young, we are often told we don’t know or understand things. I understood that being separated from my biological family caused me pain but I couldn’t say anything. The wants of my adoptive parents came before my needs. We focus on hopeful adoptive parents desires of becoming parents to the detriment of the child and society as a whole. Traumatizing children for profits is where we are. We can do better whe

When I make posts I get a lot of the same comments. So much so I get tired of answering the same comment year after year. I will save you the trouble of asking and respond to the top three. 1. Would you rather be aborted or in a dumpster? if I had been aborted, or you had been, neither one of us would know. None of this would’ve happened. I would’ve stayed in my energetic form and been born at another time. Abortion doesn’t harm our soul, or whatever word you use. Abortion was also never seen as a sin. The Bible talks anout the bitter water and how it can be used. It never mentions abortion as a sin. Abortion is a voting platform. It is used as a fear tactic. As for the dumpster, that is horrific and not the norm. Typically young mothers who are scared and are shunned by their family and Kundalini Yoga

Kundalini Yoga

Top 3 comments about adoption

When I make posts I get a lot of the same comments. So much so I get tired of answering the same comment year after year. I will save you the trouble of asking and respond to the top three. 1. Would you rather be aborted or in a dumpster? if I had been aborted, or you had been, neither one of us would know. None of this would’ve happened. I would’ve stayed in my energetic form and been born at another time. Abortion doesn’t harm our soul, or whatever word you use. Abortion was also never seen as a sin. The Bible talks anout the bitter water and how it can be used. It never mentions abortion as a sin. Abortion is a voting platform. It is used as a fear tactic. As for the dumpster, that is horrific and not the norm. Typically young mothers who are scared and are shunned by their family and

a pink background with the words being adopted doesn't mean forever family on it

Being adopted doesn’t mean forever family

I asked adoptees if they were still in contact with their adoptive families. There were more that said no than said yes. There are many reasons why this happens. A lot of adoptees were used to fill a void for the adoptive parents because they couldn’t have biological children. In these situations the adoptive parents didn’t do their work for their own trauma. Buying a baby doesn’t fix your trauma. As adoptees get older they realize that their needs weren’t met because of the beliefs that adoption “fixes” things. Adoptees are often not accepted by everyone in the adoptive family either. There is no biology to the family and the adoptive relatives to the child may feel nothing. I often heard as a child that I could date my cousins because I wasn’t biologically related. How can we be family

Adoption doesn’t hold space for the adoptee to be their authentic self

Many families love to tell stories of their ancestors. Adopted children have to act like the adoptive family’s ancestors are theirs even though they have their own heritage. The adoptive family overwrites their history in favor of their own. The child learns to adapt for fear of rejection. Many children are told their mothers loved them so much she gave them away. After the first family separation, the child feels as if love equals abandonment. Having no genetic mirroring or strong foundational beginning leaves the child not knowing their authentic self. They take on the adoptive family’s traditions and beliefs. Adoptees even have to use their family tree in school as if it were theirs. Some adoptees have lost their culture as well. We have bought the propaganda of the adoption industry

two men shaking hands with the words there is nothing ethical about adoption for the infant's adpatee

Yoga Online

Yoga Wellness

There is nothing ethical about adoption for the infant adoptee.

For a newborn baby being separated from their mother is the worst thing that can happen. Even if the mother chooses adoption for the child, it’s not for the best interest of the child. This is a selfish decision that adults make for the child. The adoptee never gets a choice. Then they don’t have the same rights as kept children. Adoption doesn’t hold space for an adopted child to be their authentic self. There is nothing ethical about forcing a child to adapt to strangers. There is nothing ethical about paying for another human being. Adoption is wholly unethical for the baby who has no say in what happens. #adoptedchameleon

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First birthday card from a biological parent

My biological father sent me a birthday card. This wasn’t an easy task for someone in a nursing home but he made it happen. This is the first time in my life a biological parent acknowledged my birthday. My birth mother ignored me her whole life. This is what adoption took from me. My father would have kept me but my mother never told him or anyone that I existed. I was such an embarrassment to her she would never talk about me. Her shame was more important than my life. My father’s rights and mine were ignored because everything was always about her. She couldn’t handle the guilt of what she did so she ignored it. We all know that ignoring things never helps anything. She now has this as her legacy. She made herself voiceless. I hope she feels what she did. I hope every moment of her aft

$Adoption is a failure of society. We focus more on everyone getting a baby. It’s an obsession. People that can’t have babies in the natural way are pandered to. We focus on their wants instead of what the baby needs. Adult adoptees were the commodity that you all want. We are speaking out about our lived experiences. When we do we are often met with, you should be grateful. It proves that people want the baby experience so bad they will ignore the actual experience of the adult adoptee. They will traumatize a baby for their own wants. They think a baby will fix their trauma. You will still have trauma. No one can fix your trauma but you. It’s your responsibility not the infants. We need to focus on family preservation instead of selling babies to people with enough money. A fraction of the$

Adoption is a failure of society

Adoption is a failure of society. We focus more on everyone getting a baby. It’s an obsession. People that can’t have babies in the natural way are pandered to. We focus on their wants instead of what the baby needs. Adult adoptees were the commodity that you all want. We are speaking out about our lived experiences. When we do we are often met with, you should be grateful. It proves that people want the baby experience so bad they will ignore the actual experience of the adult adoptee. They will traumatize a baby for their own wants. They think a baby will fix their trauma. You will still have trauma. No one can fix your trauma but you. It’s your responsibility not the infants. We need to focus on family preservation instead of selling babies to people with enough money. A fraction of the

I wish I had a dollar for every time I was talking about my lived experience as an adoptee and someone said, “what about your adoptive parents?” People think about people getting a baby but never how the adult feels about being removed from their family for the wants of strangers. Adoption in the US is a business of finding mothers in a crisis situation and convincing her to permanently separate her child from their family. They never talk about fictive kinship where a family member can take care of the child. They don’t mention kinship care where a close friend of the family can take care of the child. We also have guardianship that gives the child a family to care for them without them losing their name, health history and heritage. Guardianship is the alternative that is more child cent Kinship Care

Kinship Care

Adoption is for the wants of the adoptive parents

I wish I had a dollar for every time I was talking about my lived experience as an adoptee and someone said, “what about your adoptive parents?” People think about people getting a baby but never how the adult feels about being removed from their family for the wants of strangers. Adoption in the US is a business of finding mothers in a crisis situation and convincing her to permanently separate her child from their family. They never talk about fictive kinship where a family member can take care of the child. They don’t mention kinship care where a close friend of the family can take care of the child. We also have guardianship that gives the child a family to care for them without them losing their name, health history and heritage. Guardianship is the alternative that is more child cent

Georgia Tann

Long Term Memory

Rich And Wealthy

Adoptees remember the maternal separation

Many people still believe that babies are blank slates. That lie started with Georgia Tann. She was a child trafficker that would cater to the rich and wealthy. Many of the modern adoption laws came from her policies while running the Tennessee Children’s Home. I still get comments from people saying babies can’t remember so we don’t suffer trauma. Of course that isn’t true. All humans have implicit long term memory and trauma is stored in the body. I have very vivid memories of wearing these braces. I remember squirming on my belly like a snake trying to get away. I remember trying to escape my crib and trying to unlock the gate to the stairs. I tried to get away from my adoptive parents but had no where to go and I didn’t have language to tell anyone. I never told my adoptive parents. I