Some day I hope to celebrate the most important day of your life in the worst dress I've ever worn.

24
19

Let's never speak of 2012 again.

10
13

It would really help me in the office pool if you failed at your New Year's resolution somewhere between January 7th and 9th.

4
5

It's a miracle you haven't seen every holiday movie, considering the ungodly number of hours you've spent in front of the TV.

4
1

Sorry your beautifully decorated Christmas tree became a giant cat toy.

2

Renovating the kitchen would be a great way to make up for you never doing the cooking.

1

I think we should remodel the bathroom since it's the only safe place to hide from the kids.

1

Congratulations on having a Christmas tree that's more real than your breasts.

1

Sorry your holiday party was ruined by a guest who needed a bib more than your baby.

Happy birthday to a dear friend who will always have my support in lying about your age.

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