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I'm getting real sick and tired of food having calories.

This is so true. I can't count the times my mom has known what i was doing even before i came home. And the times she called me when i was doing something i wasn't supposed to be doing and told me to stop. :)

Congratulations on your uncanny ability to take something that is not at all about you and make it all about you.

That awkward moment when your snowman cookie turns into Jabba The Hutt...

How to fold a fitted sheet. My thoughts exactly.

I think this probably ten times day

This is hilarious!! They look so natural

sheldon cooper funny quotes

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Dear toilet paper, I'm sorry I ever took you for granted.

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Facebook Humor | Someone must care, or why else are working out & taking showers on everyone's Facebook page?

Awesome !!!!!!!!!! Really who cares what you eat, if you eat, and if you work out to lost the calories from eating!!!!

Funny text messages

I won't lie... this has happened a time or fifty.