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Everything i like is either illegal, immoral, fattening, addictive, expensive or impossible essencials-for-life

This makes me laugh... Definitely something I should keep in mind.

the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person.is bat-shit crazy. SO TRUE

Actually wanted to do this to someone yesterday.

K to T-"One day my patience will run out, and I will stab you. In the face. Very hard." Jaime-"I think you normally punch people in the face.

funny real life quotes for facebook

My favorite thing about sunglasses! things get awkward when i forget that i dont have my sunglasses on haha

"Drunk? Drunk?! Don't say that nasty word Dubbie, we're having a partyyy!"

so I have an american accent and I never shut up, but I'd talk even more with a british. I'd never stop if I had an Irish accent.

This is quite appropriate for today. (and the day before, and the day before that, etc.)

Daily Interrogations from a Four Year Old

Yes, as a matter of fact, I did know that. As does every other parent of a 4 year old. And a five year old. And a six year old.

English as a Foreign Language: Funny Signs in English Around the World

Many of you have already seen the attempt to save grandpa's life with a comma, but the picture included in this poster makes the attempt to save grandma.

couldnt have said it any better myself

Lord, give me patience, not strength!how i feel at work EVERY DAY.

Ways to tell you are grown up

25 Ways to Tell You're a Grown Up. Wow, I feel old. 25 Ways to Tell You're a Grown Up. Wow, I feel old. 25 Ways to Tell You're a Grown Up. Wow, I feel old.

The biggest lie I tell myself is "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."

Oh this is so much me.so many funny stories of the girls lost. I need to write things down more.