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haha if only i could actually say that to some people... its more true than you think

Yes, some people really do suck. Why invite them into YOUR precious life? God gives us a finite number of days above ground. Why pollute a single second/minute/hour/day/year with a sucky person? If they were the tray that raw chicken comes in, how long could you stand to leave it in your kitchen trash? Time to kick those stinky peeps to the curb trash can for pick up, baby!

No matter how much you shop, after you wear a new outfit a few times your closet magically makes clothes old and not wearable...who in the fashion business put that idea in our heads? And why dont we just out naked. It wont cost anything and every man will notice you and every bitch will be hatin.

haha! Unless your house is so huge you have many living areas specifically designated for guests! (Not me)

You know that little thing inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn't? Yeah, I don't have one of those.

Today, I will be classy and elegant... Or, I will spill food on my shirt and trip over things.

Women are like angels. If you break our wings, we'll just hop on our broom sticks. Cuz, we're flexible like that!

I like big cups and I can not lie You coffee drinkers can't deny When a triple breve overflows With steam all in your face You get AWAKE! Wanna drink you all up Cuz you notice that your cup is stuffed Full of caffeine goodness I'm hooked and I can't stop staring Oh, baby I wanna drink ya And sip you slowly My barista tried to warn me But that cup you got Make me so happy...'

I'm sure the fish jumped out of the water to be with him