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Please cancel my subscription... I've had enough of your issues.

Stopping distance and you…It is sad that this needs to be explained...

I take comfort in knowing that people younger than me look older than me.


It's time to step up & take the blame. It is, YOUR FAULT!

Hate when people post passive/aggressive FB statuses and you know it's about you

I cannot formulate an expression using tangible words in any language that would even begin to express how much you piss me off.

You just said 'seen' instead of 'saw' again. We officially can no longer be friends.

That's it? Three likes and one comment? That shit was brilliant, people. BRILLIANT.

I don't want to live on this planet anymore... No sign of intellegent life anywhere... I am surrounded by idiots.

@Kelly Sanders (remember the 'stick lady', 'hot muffins' ????) I'm sure I can think of a few more

Ahhhh! I do not speak wal-mart!!