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Now Ya Know: security guards don't have to be fit; they just have to be smart(er than the smartest dumb criminal).

Life is all about asses: You're either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, busting it, trying to get a piece of it or behaving like one. http://www.nobleworkscards.com/0690-asses-funny-talk-bubbles-happy-birthday-card.html

Had to laugh because as a kid I took off my shirt to get rid of the farmers tan and lost my shirt somewhere in the field. Oops.