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I did something similar when my ex broke into my house. I called the police and they didn't seem concerned and said "oh well you know him right" so I said yes but he has a knife. They were there in 5 minutes.

When I drink, I'm about as coordinated as a giraffe who's been shot in the ass with a tranquilizer...

Don't let people push you around. Unless it's in a wagon or something, because that could be fun.

i just came back from Ireland last week. why oh why didn't i discover this before I left?

WHOA! TOTALYY smelling bananas! YAY no more red heads!! And yes when you really hate someone EVERYTHING they do irritates you!! Yuck

Funny Insult Creator list (warning, there are curse words)

Now this looks like fun… though I'm sure I'd hyperventilate from fear of falling through.