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The people who aren't afraid to filter their bitchy and sarcastic thoughts, are my true friends, because they trust me enough.

"Kiss my ass! You cheated on me in my dream last night and I'm not over it!"    This sounds like my husband, not me.

"Kiss my ass! You cheated on me in my dream last night and I'm not over it!" This sounds like my husband, not me.

It's not our fault that we're awesome. And pretty. And awesome. | Friendship Ecard | someecards.com

It's not our fault that we're awesome. And pretty. And awesome. | Friendship Ecard | someecards.com

If you don't have anything nice to say, then come sit next to me and we will make fun of people together.

If you don't have anything nice to say, then come sit next to me and we will make fun of people together.

LOL!  pretty sure i've disappointed some people when they saw it was girl walking thru the door!

LOL! pretty sure i've disappointed some people when they saw it was girl walking thru the door!

Our friendship is one part 'encouraging poor decisions' and one part 'everyone else is stupid.'

Our friendship is one part 'encouraging poor decisions' and one part 'everyone else is stupid.'

Funny Somewhat Topical Ecard: No, I don't need to walk a mile in your shoes. I can see that you're a train wreck from all the way over here.

Funny Somewhat Topical Ecard: No, I don't need to walk a mile in your shoes. I can see that you're a train wreck from all the way over here.

Irish girl problems @Lizzie Wolfe Hahahahahaha maybe you know whos family too!

Irish girl problems @Lizzie Wolfe Hahahahahaha maybe you know whos family too!

The only thing I miss about my childhood is not having to shave my legs. And forts. I miss forts.

The only thing I miss about my childhood is not having to shave my legs. And forts. I miss forts.

We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.

We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.

Funny Workplace Ecard: Nothing is better than having a great friend like you at work to vent and bitch with, to make our day go by a little faster.

Funny Workplace Ecard: Nothing is better than having a great friend like you at work to vent and bitch with, to make our day go by a little faster.

Funny Wedding Ecard: Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who cant take care of himself.

Funny Wedding Ecard: Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown man child who cant take care of himself.