The 'smartest person I know' couldn't do what we do. Don't call for advice when the information you seek is basic information to your job. YEAHHHHHH, 'smartest person', always looking for an easy way out. How's that Associate Degree working for ya?
I dont force anything and a child who flat out refuses to go around someone for good reason, i will not make them! Call it what you will but the child will not be forced to go some where they are not safe. At the end of the day it's His choice to make.