you're so hard on yourself. take a moment. sit back. marvel at your life: at the grief that softened you, at the heartache that wisened you, at the suffering that strengthened you. despite everything, you still grow. be proud of this.
Note to self: treat yourself the way you would treat a small child. Feed yourself healthy food and make sure you spend time outside. Put yourself to bed early. Let yourself take naps. Don't say mean things to yourself. Don't put yourself in danger.