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True Dat!

Funny Somewhat Topical Ecard: You had a bad day? You poor little thing. Did a naked man eat your face off? Then shut the fuck up with your shit.

People who brush-off, dismiss, ignore, and act condescending about my limitations and the fact that I have CFIDS, gastroparesis, and chronic adult epstein barr syndrome and AM INDEED S-I-C-K....! X-{

Thank you for making me so angry that every time I open my mouth it appears that I have Tourette's Syndrome.

Oh boy, do I wish I could send this to my co-worker!

Free, Workplace Ecard: I'm Sorry. I wasn't aware "Be a Lazy Fuck" was part of your job description. I'll be more considerate next time I ask for something.

it's not cellulite, it's my   body's way of saying  "i'm sexy"...in braille

it's not cellulite, it's my body's way of saying "i'm sexy".in braille, too funny!

95% of the decisions in my life.. - http://jokideo.com/95-of-the-decisions-in-my-life/

Ecard : of the decisions I'm my life are based on whether I like the colors of something, if it is pretty, or if it smells good

Yes, I just pinned the same outfit you did... haha

Funny Movies Ecard: You know Magic Mike is going to be great when Matthew McConaughey is the least attractive of the group.

I can count all the fucks I give on one hand. Oops, I don't have any fingers. I must give zero fucks.

Funny Ted (The Movie) Ecard: I can count all the fucks I give on one hand. Oops, I don't have any fingers. I must give zero fucks. hahaha this made me laugh out loud.

i think...i may be a little too excited for the release of #magicmike. BRING IT ON, #JOEMANGANIELLO.

Funny Confession Ecard: 'I want to see Magic Mike for the compelling storyline,' said no woman, ever.

Please. - Click image to find more hot Pinterest pins

Dear men who are smart, hot, awesome and madly in love with me: Please start existing. Seriously, where are you hiding?


Funny Somewhat Topical Ecard: If by 'Let's agree to disagree,' you really mean: 'Let's each continue to think the other person is a fucking idiot,' then, yeah, sure.

Do you buy your pants on sale? Because at my house they would be 100% off.

the lesbian couple that live a block or two over who have the landscaping that i love - one of their cars is COVERED in bumper stickers.so so funny! one of us is going to need to buy an electric car and get a bunch of bumper stickers.

Not pole dancing, but regular dancing. This totally happened last weekend lol.

Ahh yeah, one of the reasons I don't drink often. Funny Weekend Ecard: Those five seconds where you go from tipsy to pole dance wasted.

*Wine Pong*

I would play wine pong. Here is a game for me! Better than beer pong.even though when I played beer pong I cheated and had my own drink!

I'm hilARRRRRious...

Sometimes i think this is really me, but i'm sure that most of the time i may be the only one laughing at my jokes, but that's perfectly alright by me b/c i am hilarious.