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I definitely did...

Ummmm, no! I read this in my own voice. Of course, my voice is pretty awesome. Yes, it is as awesome as Morgan Freeman's. No, I don't need to hear Morgan Freeman's voice to have my text properly narrated to me.

Even if I had my memory!

So I watched the vow and decided if I woke up from a coma and Channing Tatum told me he he was my husband, I wouldn't question it.

Attention students in my class, who believe YOLO is the most profound response to EVERY question...

Carpe Diem

"I'm fairly certain YOLO is just Carpe diem for stupid people." Jack Black, I believe you have just been inducted into my own personal hall of fame.

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I'm pretty much going to say something like this in my new voicemail message. I don't like checking voicemail. Either you'll call back if it's important or you'll email/text me.

Disfunctional Valentine Hearts

It is called "Dysfunctional Valentine Hearts." Please stay away dysfunctional Valentine Hearts from me. I only want healthy, fun, adventure, sweet and romantic Valentine Hearts.

bahahahaha

Snuffleupagus was one of my favorite Sesame Street characters! Did you know his first name is Aloysius! Find out other cool facts by tuning in to Sesame Street every weekday morning at

um ... quite possibly the funniest pin ever ... and mostly just cause you can hear sean connery's voice in your head saying it!!! :)

Just Sean Connery.

So, a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of the joke, but your mom is a whore. Those SNL Jeopardy skits were the best!

Yes he could lol

Morgan Freeman can say he murdered your family slowly with a butter knife and his voice would still calm you down.

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