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Sometimes, when dealing with people, you can't help but stop and think, Yup, I'm about to get my first assault charge!

Don't make me mad then tell me to calm down. That's like shooting someone then telling them not to bleed.

Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize that you're an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.

Can't figure out why children cry when they get time-out... I tried it and I LOVE it!! | Confession Ecard | someecards.com