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For my presentation today, I'll be reading the powerpoint slides word for word.

I always fear this is what people (especially my coworkers, I'm talking about you, Shannon Christie) are thinking :)

True that . . . . I used to work with a night shift manager decades ago who thought he was 'God's gift to Womanhood' so, of course, I HAD to be interested in him, right? Oh how wrong he was....so I learned I had to have comebacks for those jerks who were like him.

Yes, some people really do suck. Why invite them into YOUR precious life? God gives us a finite number of days above ground. Why pollute a single second/minute/hour/day/year with a sucky person? If they were the tray that raw chicken comes in, how long could you stand to leave it in your kitchen trash? Time to kick those stinky peeps to the curb trash can for pick up, baby!

"If being sarcastic burned calories, I'd look like half of an Olsen twin." TRUTH!

I almost showed up to work today with a positive attitude, but sarcasm stepped in and saved the day.

wondering if I could get away with hanging this in my classroom....

Funny Somewhat Topical Ecard: WITHOUT EVEN SEEING THE MOVIE, MAGIC MIKE NEEDS AN OSCAR, FOR THE CASTING ALONE.

Funny Quotes From Pinterest (25 Pics)