Ooh, another one. Uh ... the ability to alter any coefficients of friction at will during sporting events.

Ooh, another one. Uh ... the ability to alter any coefficients of friction at will during sporting events.

Oh. My. Gosh. Someone, please make this dream a reality! I used to ask for tier two support at Brighthouse and saved myself a half hour. Learned that trick after parroting the tier one help desk for a half hour once. They don't like when you finish their sentences and then answer them.

The Tech Support Call of Our Dreams

Oh. My. Gosh. Someone, please make this dream a reality! I used to ask for tier two support at Brighthouse and saved myself a half hour. Learned that trick after parroting the tier one help desk for a half hour once. They don't like when you finish their sentences and then answer them.

Flying Cars. Title text: "It's hard to fit in the backseat of my flying car with my android Realdoll when we're both wearing jetpacks."

Flying Cars. Title text: "It's hard to fit in the backseat of my flying car with my android Realdoll when we're both wearing jetpacks."

Guest comic by Zach Weiner of Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal. When I was stressed out, Zach gave me a talk that was really encouraging and somehow involved nanobots.

Guest comic by Zach Weiner of Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal. When I was stressed out, Zach gave me a talk that was really encouraging and somehow involved nanobots.

Solutions to Error Code Problems

The Real Answer to All Our Error Code Problems

Alt Text: I'm just trying to explain, please don't be jealous! Man, why are all my relationships ruined by early 90's rappers?

Alt Text: I'm just trying to explain, please don't be jealous! Man, why are all my relationships ruined by early 90's rappers?

It always bugs me when people challenge me with riddles that can only be solved with twisted linguistics rather than logic.

It always bugs me when people challenge me with riddles that can only be solved with twisted linguistics rather than logic.

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