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Funny Breakup Ecard: Well its a pity your mother din't teach you how to treat a woman. Fortunately for me, mine taught me how to treat a douchebag.

Funny Flirting Ecard: I am literate, I like beer, I have dogs and a valid driver's license. Plus, I'm really good at parallel parking. I'm kind of a catch.

"I am literate, I like beer, I have dogs and a valid driver's license. I'm kind of a catch." Well I have a cat but I like dogs too!

Pretty much my life story

When your best friend is pregnant and you realize you won't have kids at the same time as planned. In fact, at your rate hers will babysit yours. - I don't compete with my friends. I think this idea is really cool if I should have kids.

This is one reason we're friends. We understand each others love for wine. @Lauren McGregor Downs

A girl's best friend Haha Funny Friendship Ecard: A good friend brings over a bottle of wine to share. A best friend brings two.

I feel like this is really mean...that doesn't mean I don't think that about certain people though....lol

Funny Reminders Ecard: Everyone Knows you are just One positive ' I love my life ' Status away from a nervous breakdown.

Funny Family Ecard: The key to getting along with people is to either lower your expectations - or learn to drink.

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: If you ask me to hold your drink, I will drink it.

Hahhaha!

getting lit on Christmas funny funny quotes holidays humor christmas christmas quotes christmas quote christmas humor christas tree Wise Arbaugh Ballisty Allmon-Vetro

Let me get this straight, you refuse to talk to me, but you'll talk about me. You must be one jealous insecure bitch!

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: I know you're my best friend because I'd shank a bitch for you.

E card

Funny pictures about It's complicated. Oh, and cool pics about It's complicated. Also, It's complicated photos.

I know what the problem is

Haha this is so true! Anth is one of few people I will actually talk to. I HATE talking on the phone.

Funny Apology Ecard: I'm sorry for winning arguments by making you feel wrong even when you're right because I'm incredibly manipulative and also much smarter than you.

Ha!!

A good man can make you feel sexy, strong and able to take on the world. oh sorry, that's wine, wine does that.

anyone who claims their life is nothing but perfect is lying to themselves and a bigger fool than we can imagine... pathetic really

I know a couple people that do this. They have to be trying to convince themselves because they are not fooling anyone else.

Hahahahahaha

Fitness Motivation on

I hate it when you open the fridge & can't find what you were looking for.like happiness & perfect abs.

:) Who knew someone in this world could be so stupid to believe such a liar. But as my husband says, "it's not a lie if someone is so delusional as to believe their own bullshit." Jimmy's very insightful.

A pet peeve of mine. the complaints of a run ragged stay at home mom. try being a single mother with a full time job. Or just a mother with a full time job. I've done both and can tell you which is more difficult.

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