Wow uterus. Sorry for not getting you pregnant. No need to throw a temper tantrum.

Wow uterus. Sorry for not getting you pregnant. No need to throw a temper tantrum.

 I'm pretty sure pajamas are a requirement at Wal-Mart. I never follow the rules!

I'm pretty sure pajamas are a requirement at Wal-Mart. I never follow the rules!

Unless you fell off the treadmill   and smacked your face,   no one wants to hear   about your workout.

Unless you fell off the treadmill and smacked your face, no one wants to hear about your workout.

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