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"I don’t like making plans for the day because then the word premeditated gets thrown around in the courtroom" (ecards)

.hahahahahaha WOW!

If brains were gasoline, you wouldn't run a piss-ant's go-cart two laps around a Cheerio. (What about 1 lap?

You are about one smart ass comment away from being my co-star on an episode of SNAPPED.

Gilbert hahaha this just made me laugh and think about what we were talking about earlier! You+are+about+one+smart+ass+comment+away+from+being+my+co-star+on+an+episode+of+SNAPPED.

I love him... and by love I mean 51% of the time I don't want to punch him in the throat. | Confession Ecard | someecards.com

I love him. and by love I mean of the time I don't want to punch him in the throat. Exactly how i feel!

I can actually hear your words being misspelled...

I can actually hear your words being misspelled while you are speaking to me - Quote - Amen - Pet Peeve -

Photo by teeeeeeeeeena • Instagram

Free and Funny Encouragement Ecard: Learn a lesson from your dog - No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that shit and move on.

Funny Family Ecard: I pin more food and sarcastic comments than anything. People must think I am one fat bitch.

I pin more food and sarcastic comments than anything. People must think I am one fat bitch. so true lol!

Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill and not doing it because you'd miss them!

Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill & not doing it because you'd miss them! -- so us haha

Yep.

Funny Flirting Ecard: If you're talking behind my back. you're in a real good position to kiss my ass.

I often find myself contemplating if punching you in the face would be worth loosing my job. Most days the answer is yes.

A pinner posted: "I often find myself contemplating if punching you in the face would be worth losing my job. Most days the answer is yes." Is loosing your job worse than losing it?

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