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Seriously I think I wake up at like 2:00am every morning and it takes me forever to go back to sleep

Anyone know when Pinterest is sending us our W-2's?

Birds. Some people just can't handle it! I don't like birds!

When I go out in public looking like crap I throw on a pair of tennis shoes hoping that everyone will assume I've been working out.

The origin of cow licks... I once made the mistake of referencing cow licks to a group of Japanese ladies who had never heard the expression before or even met a cow. That was awkward. LOL

Adult Tetris - so true! And just as with Tetris, I am the only one in the house who does this correctly. This makes it more fun

'Why can't we be friends?', Well, because you're three gallons of crazy in a two gallon bucket and I don't have time for a mess like you.

Ok, I am funny, have nice nails (thanks Pinterest, LOL) and am already happily married.... but you would think I have a fantasy home that sparkles and the closet of a princess... those I do not have :D

Just FYI - I am out of the medicine ...