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3 languages...

"I am proficient in 3 languages--English, Sarcasm, and Profanity." Your eCards

Sometimes it hurts physically to hold in my sarcastic comments.

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: Sometimes it hurts physically to hold in my sarcastic comments.

hahaha i would die -- Drive a girl insane, delete her #pinterest board. (And get your free backup from pin4ever.com, so it never happens to you!)

If this is really a Dane Cook joke, it is perhaps the only one I have ever laughed at. Spot on, Dane.

probably... at least I'll have lots of friends there!

Yup, that sounds about right

The story of my life. // I was hoping for a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed.

Funny Somewhat Topical Ecard: You do realize that my vagina has an On and Off switch linked to the words that come out of your mouth.

Free and Funny News Ecard: You do realize that my vagina has an On and Off switch linked to the words that come out of your mouth.

sarcasm in lieu of daily beatings...your choice...

Funny Confession Ecard: I use sarcasm because beating the crap out of people is in fact frowned upon in most societies.

Funny Saying

Sarcasm- this is soooo true in my family and friends. If we bust your chops, you have been accepted as one of us!

Thank you!

Being that sarcasm is something I consider to be my first language; it's always fun to talk to a person as sarcastic as me. Honestly, I only know of a couple people that respond to me this way. Those people are awesome though!

Everyone around me seems to be getting married and having babies, and I'm just sitting here like... I like wine and uninterrupted sleep.

Free and Funny Confession Ecard: Everyone around me seems to be getting married and having babies, and I'm just sitting here like. I like wine and uninterrupted sleep.

Haha! True.

hahaha so true. The speed in which a woman says 'nothing' when asked 'what's wrong' is inversely proportional to the severity of the shitstorm that's comin.

Jkr

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: I know you're my best friend because I'd shank a bitch for you. Right in the kidney.

Funny Reminders Ecard: Some days should come with a warning label: Today is going to suck, so bring alcohol.

This was true for me today. Actually, this whole sticking week. Funny Reminders Ecard: Some days should come with a warning label: Today is going to suck, so bring alcohol.

(funny,funny stuff,lol,lolsotrue,true story,so true,i can relate,bitch)

Sometimes, even I can't tell if I'm being sarcastic or if I'm really just a bitch. Yep, that's me

best-memes: not anti social Best-memes in now... - stressfree

Funny Confession Ecard: Im not anti-social. I just have a strong aversion to B., drama, and pretending. makes-me-laugh-quotes