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I get scared when I have to sneeze while driving.

Accurate. In our heads we're funny and witty and charismatic. In real life we're like, "This isn't funny, Dean. The voice says I'm almost out of minutes."

You my friend, should have been swallowed....GOD THAT'S GOOD!!!!

Time for a new order taker. And maybe a decorator, too. :-)

"The thing about quotes on the Internet is you can not confirm their validity." ~ Abraham Lincoln

Don't worry Pinterest, as I get ready for yet another day of college classes this doesn't make me want to curl up in a ball and die or anything.

OHMY!!! I literally burst out laughing. Not even joking. This is scary and this is funny. Oh man... her face... >:}