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Funny Confession Ecard: Im not the cat lady type. Im more like an actual cat. I want affection when I want it and on my terms.The rest of the time I want to claw out your eyes and piss in your shoe.

Funny Confession Ecard: Im not the cat lady type. Im more like an actual cat.The rest of the time I want to claw out your eyes and piss in your shoe.

If you want to drive a girl insane simply delete her Pinterest page. It's like destroying her memories, hopes & desires. -Dane Cook.

more like drive a girl to murder. i can't stand Dane Cook but this is hilarious.

Dear Face Wash Commercials, Nobody actually splashes their face with water like that. Sincerely, my bathroom is sopping wet now.

Dear Face Wash Commercials, Nobody actually splashes their face with water like that. Sincerely, my bathroom is sopping wet now. I tried it once but now I know to never do that again!

Mmhm.

Free and Funny Friendship Ecard: You're ridiculous. And by that I mean, we are going to best friends.

So sorry to hear that the karma cake you baked yourself isn't tasting as good as you expected. Perhaps a nice glass of 'I fucking told you so' will help wash it down.

Funny Breakup Ecard: So sorry to hear that the karma cake you baked yourself isn't tasting as good as you expected. Perhaps a nice glass of 'I fucking told you so' will help wash it down.

Everyone is having babies and I'm over here like, "Look at these 500 pictures of my dog." Look at these 500 pictures of my dog.

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