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LVC people would know and understand this..I've never had doors held for me for more than 30 seconds anywhere but there.

Sorry that most of my hilarious jokes are borderline inappropriate. And by sorry, I mean You're Welcome.

When I go out in public looking like crap I throw on a pair of tennis shoes hoping that everyone will assume I've been working out.

I set my clock ahead to prevent being late...all it really does is sharpen my subtraction skills

I do so many things well, none of which generate income.

Sometimes I forget to change the captions on my pins and worry people will think I really said that.

Dear God! No more online dating photos of shirtless straight men taking self-portraits in their bathroom mirrors, please! Is that really necessary?

Exactly. . Isn't it funny how we train our minds to see the slightest change as momentous? Bill ✔️ . (curation & caption: Bill Gibson-Patmore)

I love waking up with you by my side. You turn dull moments into entertaining ones. You're always there for me. iPhone, I'd be lost without you.

Some people will watch a movie to undwind. And some of us just go on Pinterest for 2 hours instead. | Confession Ecard | someecards.com

If being in my pajamas by 7pm is wrong, then I don't want to be right.