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I've decided that from now on I'm going to answer every question like a presidential candidate.

Plus a put away button. Laundry takes up half my day!

I tried to throat punch you via text but there's no app for that. I looked. Twice.

The woman sent roses to Rue McClanahan before she died, with a note saying "I hope you die so I can be the only Golden Girl left! Love you!"

Truth. Truth. Absolute. Truth. The different types of Facebook users. The truth about people on Facebook......

I'm terrified of a world in which spanking is socially acceptable. Shame on the person who made this pin.

And that’s how it actually happened…

Funny Weekend Ecard: I haven't been this excited about a Friday, since last Friday.

Bahahahaha...might have to use this one next time :-P

funny auto-correct texts - The 15 Funniest Autocorrects From January 2012

I'd do anything to lose 10lbs, except eat healthy and work out.

This might be the one concoction I haven't yet tried for my insomnia!