Don't beat yourself up. It doesn't work! Studies consistently show that self-criticism is associated with poor self-control and motivation, increased procrastination, and reduced creativity. Via bakadesuyo.
Biblical Characteristics Of A Christian Leader - It is important to distinguish between leadership qualities generally and those specific to Christian maturity emphasizing the working of the Holy Spirit.
Life is not fair. but Jesus is so let Him make all of your decisions. Most things we suffer in life sometimes we bring on ourselves as a result of bad choices. Put God first and choose the right thing. You will suffer less in life.