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Mom: The amazing ability to hear a sneeze through closed doors, in the middle of the night, 3 bedrooms away.... while daddy snores next to you.

Mom: The amazing ability to hear a sneeze through closed doors, in the middle of the night, 3 bedrooms away.... while daddy snores next to you.

STRANGERS think I'm quiet. MY FRIENDS think I'm outgoing. MY BEST FRIENDS know that I'm completely insane.

STRANGERS think I'm quiet. MY FRIENDS think I'm outgoing. MY BEST FRIENDS know that I'm completely insane.

Funny Friendship Ecard: Not too many people like us when we hang out together...but they're just mad they can't be this awesome.

Funny Friendship Ecard: Not too many people like us when we hang out together...but they're just mad they can't be this awesome.

Funny Friendship Ecard: I hate to tell you, but curves and rolls are not the same thing. Not at all.

Funny Friendship Ecard: I hate to tell you, but curves and rolls are not the same thing. Not at all.

We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.

We are so hilarious. I feel bad for the people who don't get to listen to our conversations and enjoy our hilariousness.

I'm not calling you a 'slut'. I am calling you a 'penny'-because you are two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants.

I'm not calling you a 'slut'. I am calling you a 'penny'-because you are two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants.

On our anniversary, I want you to know how much I've enjoyed annoying you all this time & how excited I am to keep doing so in the future.

On our anniversary, I want you to know how much I've enjoyed annoying you all this time & how excited I am to keep doing so in the future.

We've been friends so long I rely on your memory to remember my own past.

We've been friends so long I rely on your memory to remember my own past.

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