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Lies.

WHY I NEVER TOLD MY KIDS THESE LIES.Funny Family Ecard: My parents accused me of lying today. I looked at them and said 'tooth fairy, easter bunny, santa claus' and walked away like a boss.

i've done this my whole, entire life!!!!

This is me : ) If I really like you, I'll be sarcastic and tease you relentlessly. If I don't like you, I'll be very polite and pleasant. I think I may have somehow gotten this backwards.

Come see our huge warehouse of commercial restaurant equipment! We have 100,000 sq/ft of great quality new and used equipment!

I'm pretty sure it's called PMS because it's easier to say than estrogen induced manic depressive bipolar disorder prone to fits of psychopathic rage.

Bug words

Sometimes,I use big words I don’t always fully understand in an effort to make myself sound more photosynthesis.

Lessons from Mom

Funny pictures about Lessons from Mom. Oh, and cool pics about Lessons from Mom. Also, Lessons from Mom photos.

I'm having fruit salad for dinner. Well, it's mostly grapes actually. Ok, all grapes. Fermented grapes. I'm having wine for dinner.

Funny Drinks/Happy Hour Ecard: I'm having fruit salad fordinner. I'm having wine for dinner.

faster than the speed of light

Funny Confession Ecard: Nothing faster than the speed of light. Nothing moves faster than a girl untagging herself from a photo that makes her look fat. There really is an ecard for that!

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