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    • Chubbies Shorts

      The Pina Quadlatas - Pretty simple stuff – take a bunch of rum, chuck it into a blender filled with coconut cream, coconut milk, pineapple chunks and a buttload of ice cubes, then push "BLEND". The result? The perfect Pina Quadlata – coco-pine-appley goodness for all to enjoy.

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    The Starboards - Michelangelo would blush at the nautical perfection of these wave wallopers. If they don't instantly qualify you to captain an America's Cup boat, well that would actually make sense because they're shorts. But that doesn't mean it won't happen...

    The Ahabs - Call me Ishmael. Or just call me the most righteously badass pair of shorts e'er to navigate the high seas. Your choice.

    The Grande Kahunas - Nobody messes with The Grande Kahuna. Well actually a person did once. ONCE.

    The Flyin Hawaiians - Dang, these shorts look good. I'm not even mad, just impressed.

    The Bahama Mamas - Who doesn't love a good old fashioned Bahama Mama? This sultry princess is crafted by chucking three types of rum (Malibu, C-Mo, and 151) in a bunch of pineapple juice and plopping in some ice cubes. She's a great gal, but I'll be damned if she doesn't have some bite to her. Must be all the rum.

    The Mai Thighs - This most righteous vacation staple is the result of mixing up rum, triple sec, and sweet and sour mix. Just toss all that crap into a cup with ice cubes in it – put your hand over the top, shake the shit out of it and BOOYAH! You got yerself a Mai Thigh.

    The Luau Kings - These bodacious brohemian rhapsodies are the emperors of the lounge short. They were recently approved by the FDA as the first pair of shorts to fabrically induce utter and complete relaxation in their wearer. Seriously.

    Sex on The Beach - Grab yourself some vodka, peach schnapps, OJ, and cranberry juice and pour those mothers over some ice. Shake it up if you want, hell I don't care, just make sure you use protection. And by that I mean a napkin to protect your Chubbies from getting stained. Get your mind out of the gutter.

    The Pina Quadlatas - Pretty simple stuff – take a bunch of rum, chuck it into a blender filled with coconut cream, coconut milk, pineapple chunks and a buttload of ice cubes, then push "BLEND". The result? The perfect Pina Quadlata – coco-pine-appley goodness for all to enjoy.

    The Rope Swings - You may not be throwing out triple backs out there, but you're damn sure not gonna be thinking about work and that's all that matters.

    The Motorboaters - Let's face it, we're all motorboatin' suns a bi*ches when we get out on the lake.

    The Gainers - Everyone's waiting for it and someone's gotta do it, so it might as well be you.

    The Brunch-O-Matics - Fire up some bottomless, eggs benny, and hashy b's and hop on-board the train to funkytown.  See ya never, Monday.

    The Sunday Fundays - Friday and Saturday were epic weirdapaloozas for the record books - why in the hell should Sunday be any different? Get on back out there and do some work - the weekend is not over and we damn well gotta take advantage.

    The Mimosatron 5000s - Day party sequence mode countdown hyper-drive ACTIVATED.

    The Trunkelstiltskins - Remember that fairy tale about Trunkelstilstkin? That righteous dude who hung out at the pool all the time sipping on Mai Tais, snatching footballs out of the air, catching the eye of many a lady and spinning yarn into the most bodacious swimming trunks known to mankind?

    The Count Trunkulas - "I'd like to be pimps from Oakland or cowboys from Arizona but it's not Halloween. Grow up Peter Pan, Count Trunkula."

    The KerplunketyTrunkensteins - Yup, that is all.

    The Trunkleberry Finns - Time to grab a straw hat and a raft, and head on down the river in these bad boys.

    The Dr. Trunkensteins - The funkiest trunks this side of the Mississippi - and it doesn't even matter which side of the Mississippi you're on. They're still the funkiest. Don't believe me? Ask me.

    The Hammer Trunks - "I like to think of Jesus like with giant eagles wings, and singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with like an angel band and I'm in the front row and I'm Hammer Trunks."

    The Daft Trunks - With these righteous mamma jammas you won't have to stay up all night to get lucky, you just have to go swimming.

    The 360 Tomahawk Trunks - Prepare for utter domination in your next game of poolsketball. Note: jumping entirely out of the pool for a fresh rim-rocking slamma jamma is 100% legal.

    The Trunky Monkeys - Grab yerself a pina colada and head on down to the pool - it's Trunky Monkey time.

    The Babe Tractor Beams (BTBs)