I like to surround myself with people who share in my inappropriate comments, sarcasm and random shenanigans. | Thinking Of You Ecard | someecards.com

I like to surround myself with people who share in my inappropriate comments, sarcasm and random shenanigans. | Thinking Of You Ecard | someecards.com

People don't want to hear about your diet. Just shut up, eat your lettuce, and be sad.

People don't want to hear about your diet. Just shut up, eat your lettuce, and be sad.

I'm sorry I fell asleep ten minutes after starting the movie it took us three hours to agree on.

I'm sorry I fell asleep ten minutes after starting the movie it took us three hours to agree on.

The best thing about being in my 30's is that I did all of my stupid shit before the internet.

The best thing about being in my 30's is that I did all of my stupid shit before the internet.

It takes about 2.9 seconds for me to go from 'this is the best day ever' to 'I want to stab every person on planet Earth.'

It takes about 2.9 seconds for me to go from 'this is the best day ever' to 'I want to stab every person on planet Earth.'

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