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Words cannot describe the sheer awesomeness of this woman.

EVERY phone should have this!! I highly dislike drunk texters and dialers.

Twilight? Awesome? What is this foolish lie that you speak? Or has one gone and changed the dear definition of 'awesome' to 'sucks beyond all imagining and kills brain cells with every word printed on the page'?

True dat. Bring back the chunky, old-fashioned TV's so America can get rid of the obesity epidemic!

13 Simple Steps to Get You Through a Rough Day. This seriously had me cracking up for at least 10 minutes.

Hahahaaa. I LOVE this story, and my 19 year old daughter does, too. One of my last real "discussions" in the classroom involved a statement I made about having to "get out the sewing machine last night"..... A student (several) thought I was just being stupid (Science-fictiony) w/them... Had NEVER seen or heard of a sewing machine..... and we're in GEORGIA.....

I am really bad at measuring pasta, so if you and 79 of your friends want spaghetti, come on over!

The fate of unicorns. They evolved!

Or why some animals are named after other animals... Like "Spider crab" and "Crab spider"... Porcupine fish... I mean, what if those other animals didn't exist? What would they be called?!

I love pinning motivational sayings on pinterest that motivate me to keep pinning motivational sayings on pinterest.

I'd say that's pretty accurate...although it does depend on who the drunk is lol

Funny Baby Ecard: Oh, that's cute that you let your kid get away with everything. Won't be cute when he is 28 and still living in your basement.