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get me drunk enough ....

yes, I literally laughed out loud!a harry potter fan is a hard thing to be!

haha...he's not much of an actor,but he doesn't have to talk

If only it worked like that. I'd make sure I was arrested often!

Um. Yep. That's right. It's a museum.  (cottage and vine)

Museum of "Two Kids Live in This House"! ummmm yes this is my entire house

fun, funny, ironic, good mood switch on, lol, when you need something to turn instantly your lips upwards. Smile like there's no tomorrow :-D

if I had a nickel for every time my phone auto corrected 'shit' into 'shut' I would have 16 nickels

Actually it's me washing the dishes and Adam slowly putting his dirty dishes in the sink

That awkward moment when i'm doing dishes and my family slowly puts their dishes in the sink. All the time :)

what i refer to as my "twenty-dollar stories".

"You know those stories you start out telling. and then you realize there's no point and you wonder, 'why am I telling this story'. It happens to me a lot.

Guilty As Charged!

how you doin'?I totally did read it in my mind in the exact voice of Joey! Oh how I LOVE Friends!

BAHAHAHAHAAH

To the window To the wall To the sweat drop down my balls To all these bitches crawl To all skeet skeet motherfucker All skeet skeet god damn To all skeet skeet motherfucker All skeet skeet god damn (GOT DAMN)

the only 2 reasons i listen to voicemails.. 1. if i don't know the number. 2. to get rid of the icon on the screen

I hate voicemails. I don't have a voicemail box for this reason. Either text me or I'll see that you called and call back when I get a chance.

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