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"Say hello to my caffeinated little friend." - Mr. Takei ... What about Tarantino? Or Maraschino? Or Jalapeno?

What I lack in skinniness I make up for in awesomeness.

Yes I can be evil- probably more than my family wants- but they love me....

The uterus transplant was a success. I'm sure you'll find your husband much more understanding now.

this is only funny for 3 weeks out of the month

last night sitting on the couch with my husband I said, 'I love you.' he asked, 'is that you or the wine talking?' I said 'it's me.....talking to the wine.'

PMS is SOOOO much fun! Not really at all actually!! : (

Painfully honest is the best way to go. If it costs you a relationship, it wasn't the right relationship.

Who was the 1st lady to shave her legs & instill in us that hairy legs are gross???? It's her fault we must have hairless legs!!!

It's A Scientific Fact: You should never tell a woman she's crazy, unless you want to see crazy.

So it WASN'T a mis-calculation on my part! Excellent! Glad I can come here to make up perfectly logical excuses--I mean reasons.