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Pinner wrote: At my first apartment, in an ancient garage carriage house that was definitely haunted, my microwave made strange noises and flashed 666 all the time. Probably have cancer now.

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The funniest thing about this is that, at first glance, I thought this said, "Valve."

very clever. guerrilla marketing../bahaha

I should probable use pop culture references too. Making fun of myself by saying, "3 out of 5 days you're late to work... Guaranteed Monday is one of them, what's today?" Is getting old.

Im against recycling because it makes me look like a huge alcoholic to my garbage man.

That awkward moment when you've realized your muffin top has now become a pound cake.