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You pick up on their train of thought and can see the ending, so know the answer before they ask the question

You pick up on their train of thought and can see the ending, so know the answer before they ask the question

Sometimes, I miss you. Then, I remember what a douche you were and how awesome I am. And then I'm like, "No. I'm good."

Sometimes, I miss you. Then, I remember what a douche you were and how awesome I am. And then I'm like, "No. I'm good."

I'm sorry I fell asleep ten minutes after starting the movie it took us three hours to agree on.

I'm sorry I fell asleep ten minutes after starting the movie it took us three hours to agree on.

Quit getting offended at cuss words. I said 'fuck', I didn't smack your baby...get the fuck over it. Fuck.

Quit getting offended at cuss words. I said 'fuck', I didn't smack your baby...get the fuck over it. Fuck.

Okay... probably not really Dr. Seuss, but a pretty good fake. Dying....

Okay... probably not really Dr. Seuss, but a pretty good fake. Dying....

My dentist told me I needed a crown. I looked at him and said, 'I know, right?'

My dentist told me I needed a crown. I looked at him and said, 'I know, right?'

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