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All Occasion / Birthday Card - Friends don't let friends drink and take home ugly men - Retro Friends. $2.75, via Etsy.

She told me she has been wishing for a unicorn forever - a real unicorn, not a stuffed one like the one she got from Santa last year. :o)

Reasons you may drink before noon: - football season (doesn't have to be game day OR tailgating...just have to be football season). -bloody Mary's or mimosas (duhh, brunch!) -cinco de mayo -st Patrick's day -if your in Las Vegas -vacation (the entire week before and after) - your birthday -Sunday

Funny Breakup Ecard: Look I found your knife... It was stuck in MY BACK, but I got it out and I'm sure you'll need it again real soon!

I'm a Unicorn 12x18 Art Print

Update: I have found the artist, Bikeparts aka Sebastien Millon , on Etsy, art available as a print or tee via the link....INFJ the rarest, occurring in only 2% of the population, spotting one is as unusual as encountering a unicorn and even if you meet an INFJ, you may never know because we won't be sharing ourselves with you. Badass Unicorn -- fvckin shit up from day one.

Bless me with patience... Not opportunities to be patient, I've had plenty of those and they don't seem to be working. The actual patience...

Due to the rising cost of ammunition, I will no longer be able to provide a warning shot. Thanks for your patience and understanding... These are hard times.