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from YourTango

Hilarious Quotes For Sarcastic Women Who Honestly Don't Give A F*ck

I can't remember dates, appointments, directions - but I can remember someone's favorite flower, color, or dessert. Why, brain? WHY?

from Dummies of the Year

12 Funny Quotes for Today

I especially like what I call "The 5 minute slap". You sarcastically call somebody out, and they don't understand it for 5 or more minutes...then when they finally do, they go, "hey, wait a minute!", but it's long over by then…!!