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Free and Funny News Ecard: I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

Newton's 3rd Law of Love: For every happy 2nd wife, there is an equally unhappy and opposite-looking ex-wife.

Newton's Law of Love: For every happy wife, there is an equally unhappy and opposite-looking ex-wife.

It's true - there actually IS someone who always wonders why I'm so quiet

Mom always told me if you cant say anything nice, then dont say anything at all. And some people wonder why Im so quiet around them.Via someecards

I'm not an astronomer, but i'm pretty sure that the earth revolves around the sun and not you.

Sometimes people just need to hear it. Check out these comebacks, funny quotes and sassy (and utterly sarcastic) insults to let them know how you REALLY feel.

This pin is dedicated to the Roly-Poly Little Bat-Faced Girl who has no idea that "You Can Call Me Al" runs through my head when I see her. Also dedicated to the Oompa Loompa. (I'm going to hell).

Hahaha 😂 So true! That used to be a favorite past time for me and a friend at the gym: making up nicknames for people. Ya gotta do something to pass the time!

I've decided to add 'extensive experience in dealing with stupid people' to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill!!

Funny Confession Ecard: I've decided to add 'extensive experience in dealing with stupid people' to my resume. That has got to be a marketable skill!

Omg i so wanna tell a few people this right now!!

The Pity Train has just derailed at the corner of Suck It Up & Move On, and crashed into We All Have Problems, before coming to a stop at Get The Hell Over It.

Today, the first day of Christmas holidays, we've broken up a day early for an inset day. I had seriously fun parent plans. The farm, make cookies and the cine

Today, the first day of Christmas holidays, we've broken up a day early for an inset day. I had seriously fun parent plans. The farm, make cookies and the cine

I actually prefer a  knerdy-knight with swag who wears shiny armor - fashioned from a  roll of aluminum foil -by his lady in waiting.  For obvious reasons, I won't let him touch that sharp metal cutter on the edge of the box.

Sometimes, your knight in shining armor is just a retard in tin foil.

...maybe a little rude

Free and Funny Reminders Ecard: I don't mean to be rude, but fuck you and shut up.

If you

8 Ways to Stay Motivated After Spring Break

Strength + Bail $

Lord give me patience.Because, if you give me strength, I'm gonna need bail money to go with it.

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